Monday, September 3, 2007

Mancat Monday: Dear Peach Man #5 AND Simone's Thank You

Dear Peach Man,
I need your help as a life coach. How can I get my humans to stop picking me up for cuddles? I hate cuddles but I don't want to hurt their feelings.
FAZ

Dear FAZ,
How much do you hate these cuddles? To what extremes are you willing to go make them stop? The first though that came to me was to do the obvious and use your claws and teeths. I'm guessing though, you done this already. And it is just a bit meaner than you are aiming for. So, maybe you need to "kick it up a notch". I think you should try passing gas whenever they cuddle you. Really foul, silent but deadly ones. That way you are smelly, but not smelly all the time like you-know-who AND it appears to be accidental so no hurt feelings. You have to train your humans to associate negative things with cuddles. Or, you could always train yourself to like cuddles. I've been working on this myself over the years. I started by sitting next to my mama and then letting her hold me for 2 seconds and then a little longer and a little longer and pretty soon, I sorta liked it. But still, being held isn't my favorite either, I got better things to do!

Peach Man

Hi Nephew Peach,
this is your Aunt Ellen from California asking some advice on stuffed nostrills withou going to the VET!!! Your senile, arthritic old aunt.
Love ya Nephew Peach Aunt Ellen


Dear Aunt Ellen, I think you should spend extra time in the new bathroom. That way you get the steamy benefits of showers (clear out those sinuses) AND you can sneeze all over the new bathroom and make it yours. That's what I'd do. Showertime, Auntie Ellen!
Peach Man


Simone Here: I know it is Mancat Monday and believe me I wanna stay away from all that Peachy Nonsense, but I do want to thank everyone for their birthday wishes and Nice Presents. It was such a great birthday thanks to you all. I will post pictures on Tuesday, since Scout will let me share Tuxie Tuesday, I'm sure.

11 comments:

Samantha & Mom said...

Peach, you always give great advice!
Want to come over and go ice skating with me? Let me know. You can always leave a message in the cbox.
Your girlcat,
Samantha

Dragonheart, Merlin, Devi, and Chloe said...

Great advice, Peach Man. You are an excellent advice columnist!

Simone, I'm glad you had a happy birthday. :)

HRH Yao-Lin said...

gosh you give the best advice!! Right, I am going to put pen to paper, i have so many problems! x

Lux said...

Excellent advice - I always learn something when I come here!

Zippy, Sadie, Speedy and M'Gee said...

Grate advice as ushooal Peach. We'z glad dat Simone hadded a good purrthday.

Daisy said...

Peach Man, I always like reading your advice!

Jimmy Joe said...

Hey Peach--have you tried knocking all of the pens and pencils in the house on the floor and batting them around? That can keep you busy for a while. Good advice today, too!
Your ol' buddy, Jimmy Joe

Mr. Hendrix said...

You give great advice Peach Man! Those are some good tips.

As for toy tips. One that works, no beans needed is the "Kitty Go Crazy Interactive Toy" at Petsmart. It runs on batteries and the arm has lotsa stuff you can clip on it and it randomly swings around so you can catch it.
Do you like bubbles? There is "Catch a Bubble" there too and it is only like $5.00. Your beans don't have to leave the couch!
I also love my "Remote Control Micro Mouse" even tho the reviews online are low. Mine has worked for 6 months so far. It won't work well on carpets tho so use the kitchen floor. Again, minimal bean activity.
Let's see...oh! duh, don't forget the red dot laser toy.
I checked Petsmart.com and they show pictures of all of these if you want to check them out.
Huh, I wonder if I have to many toys? NOT!

Mr. Hendrix said...

PS I'm glad you had a great birthday Simone. Thanks for inviting me & Bendrix. He sayz sorry about the shredding of the paper towel roll....
We can't wait to see your pictures!

Hot(M)BC said...

I'll have to keep that first advice in mind. heheh
Purrrrrs,
your bud Pepi

Victor Tabbycat said...

Peach Man, if yur lookin fur toys an don't wanna send yur beans out into the heat, look no further than the kitchen! Try waded up paper or tin foil to chase. Pull out a paper bag to play in. Toss the paper or foil INTO the bag. Get an empty box wif a paw hole an put the toy INSIDE. Ask yur beans fur a piece of tissue paper! Oh, I luv tissue paper! Amember cat rule number 23c: the cheaper the toy, the more fun it is!
An when yur tired an thirsty, how bout an ice cube in yur water bowl? Sum kitties fink it's fun. Purrs!